|
The
New Dude ( Outside Traveler Magazine)
By Tim Brooks,
Family Edition 2003
“
HORSES ARE AFRAID OF TWO THINGS,” Dan Morin explained,
taking off his Stetson and settling himself near the huge
granite fireplace in the parlor of his Sundance Trail Guest
Ranch. “Everything that moves and everything that
doesn’t.”
Dan was giving two dozen of us dudes
the introductory talk for our week at the ranch, and
it wasn’t going
well. The thing to remember about horses, he said, is that
they are at the bottom of the food chain. Everything eats
them given the chance: bobcats, wolves, lynxes, mountain
lions. “Think of a horse as a very large rabbit,” he
suggested, one that will select from three unpleasant responses
at the first hint of danger: buck, bolt, or bite. The art
of riding, therefore, seemed to consist mostly of avoiding
stuff your horse might be afraid of. Yeah, yea, I thought.
But what if you’re afraid of the horse?
Given that fear, it may sound odd that
I brought my wife, Barbara, and seven-year-old daughter,
Maddy, out from Vermont
last August to spend a week at a dude ranch in Red Feather
Lakes, Colorado, 37 miles northwest of Fort Collins. But
the fact is that I didn’t have to spend the entire
week surrounded by stampeding cattle, being yelled at by
leathery wranglers, or constantly in the saddle. Sundance
is a sort of multisport adventure center offering a hyperactive
menu on top of riding hiking, rock climbing, mountain biking,
fishing, whitewater rafting, four-wheeling, archery, riflery—the
full western octathlon.
Besides, my wife loves riding, and
she hoped Maddy would like it, too. I wanted to explore
the Colorado Rockies,
and I didn’t want to go on foot because, to misquote
Gertrude Stein, there’s too much there, there. So
we’d do it the old-fashioned way: on horseback. And
that’s how—even though tall hats look silly
on me and, having grown up in England, I’d already
eaten enough beans for a lifetime—I started thinking
about ranches.
Dude ranching started to catch on in the 1850s when western
farmers, always on the lookout for a second income, started
hosting aristocratic adventurers from Britain, Ireland,
and Russia in search of good hunting. One party in 1871,
guided by Buffalo Bill Cody, shot more than 600 bison and
200 elk, and traveled the Colorado Territory with French
chefs and 25 wagons, including three that served as mobile
icehouses.
My favorite dude was my countrywoman
Isabella Bird, who visited Colorado in 1873. She survived
rattlesnakes, locusts,
and ghastly frontier food (she described one entrée
as “black with living, drowned, and half drowned
flies”). Bird rounded up cattle and climbed Longs
Peak—which at 14,255 feet was a considerable achievement,
even if her detractors say that she was hauled up the difficult
parts in a basket.
Today’s dude ranching is, frankly,
less arduous. The Sundance Trail Lodge is a large A-frame
log cabin,
perhaps built by someone familiar with Architectural Digest,
flanked by two smaller cabins, housing a total of 24 guests.
Built in 1968, the lodge has a large dining room as well
as a parlor, two guest suites, and quarters for the owners,
Dan and his wife, Ellen. We stayed out back in a kind of
woodsy duplex among the trees that comprised of a one-bedroom
and a two-bedroom suite. Our quarters were small yet comfortable,
with a shower but, thank God, no TV or telephone. Sundance
is neither Old West nor new age, more like an amiable,
unpretentious family home, with big picture windows and
pine furniture, that happens to have a lot of land and
a lot of horses.
And I mean a lot of land. The ranch is on 140 acres, surrounded
by 660,000 acres of Roosevelt National Forest between the
Mummy and Rawah ranges of the Rockies, a remarkable setting:
yellow-gray granite hills like stacks of pancake; forest
of ponderosa pine, aspen, and Norway spruce; a floor of
sand, pine needles, carpet juniper, and fragments of dead
branches, bleached like bones. At 8,000 feet, poisonous
snakes are rare. Sundance is too high for most insects,
too. Just the brilliant western sky, broad-tailed hummingbirds
around the porch, cool nights, and the sighing of the wind
in the pines.
After his first-morning talk, Dan led
us down to the corral, where we met the wranglers, all
age 20 or 21: Dustin, Josh,
Lonni (the children’s wrangler), and Rifka. All four
in addition to having spent most of their lives in the
saddle, were college kids working over their summer break.
“If your butt’s sore,” Dustin was saying
in his droll cowboy way, “your stirrups are too long.
If your knees are sore, your stirrups are too short. If
both of ‘em are sore, your stirrups are about right.”
We were all quizzed about our level
of horsemanship and assigned horses for the week accordingly.
The more experienced
dudes were eyeing lean horses distantly related to the
Maserati; I was hoping for something like a 1964 Land Rover.
By then all I could remember of Dan’s talk was that
one end of a horse kicked and the other bit.
Sundance Trail has a stable of 21 quarter
horses and leases 30 more for the summer visitors. My
prospective mount,
a roan named Redman, squinted at me sideways, his eyes
barely open in resentful and reptilian leer. “I am
not a mountain lion,” I told him. “I am not
a bobcat. I am not a wolf.”
These calming words must have done
the trick, for once I was up in the saddle, the ground
a distant memory, Redman
turned out to be amiable and touch-sensitive, if rather
generous in his output of methane. By the second day I
was giving him a little more than a twitch of the rein
or a nudge of the heel. I realized that “ride” is
used in two opposite senses: to be in charge or to give
up control. When your horse is descending a steep, narrow
trail, picking its way through sand and stones, you have
to ride by letting go, releasing your hips to go with the
horse while the rest of you remain level—like surfing
from the waist down.
We graduated from one-hour rides, along
the piney trails that surrounded the ranch, to three-
and four-hour rides
among the buttery rocks that made up the ridges. Dustin
sang cowboy songs, Josh told cowboy jokes, and nobody got
yelled at or stampeded. On the last day we rode out to
a panoramic outdoor breakfast up on a rocky knoll, and
those who were expert riders and hadn’t eaten too
much galloped back. When we weren’t on horseback—and
as the week went on, each family increasingly wandered
from the herd—we took evening hikes to some of the
surrounding outcrops, shot pool in the rec room, explored
the area in the ranch’s jeep, and spent more and
more time lounging around on the porch, talking more slowly.
Some of the more traditional western
activities were less of a hit. When we drove 15 miles
downslope to the bend-in-the-road
hamlet of Livermore to watch the weekly calf-roping—a
strange and demanding sport—some were bemused. (“Novel
concept,” observed Ken, an architect from Philadelphia.( “Recreational
cattle.”) Others, like Barbara, were appalled at
the squeals of the calves, rushing down the chute ahead
of the cattle prods.
“You just ate beef kebab,” I
pointed out.
“yes, but I didn’t play with my food,” she
retorted.
The beauty of Sundance was that everyone—the adults
as well as the kids, who ranged from three to 15 years
old—found and fell into his or her own rhythm. The
two 15-year-olds, for example, invoked the Teenager’s
Bill of Rights: One was happy enough not joining in much
of anything: the other made a token appearance on horseback,
then spent the rest of the week rafting.
Our family found rhythms we’d never have expected.
I overcame my unease around horses and my fear of heights
(I thought that on rock-climbing day, they’d have
to haul me up in a basket) and ended up whooping and swinging
across the 60-foot rock face like Spider-Man. Yet I probably
got the most pleasure from teaching Maddy and her new friends
Faye, 9, Kirk, 10, and Patrick, 11, how to play cricket
with a branch and a pine cone, a multicultural sporting
feat beyond even Isabella Bird.
Barbara followed Maddy over to the
rifle range—a
couple of shelves of tin cans set up in the trees—and,
to her own amazement, turned out to be a markswoman.
Maddy, surrounded by so much that was new, never became
entirely comfortable on a horse and balked at the rock
face, but found her own fun, hiking and clambering up the
boulders around the ranch with the younger kids, in pursuit
of a dozen cats. No one suspected that her favorite day
would turn out to be the afternoon we spent whitewater
rafting.
Even though the Cache La Poudre River,
normally Class III and IV, was so low that August that
we could have hopped
out and walked—and our guide from Rocky Mountain
adventures did, whenever we ran onto rocks—we all
paddled hard screamed harder, and spun downstream. When
the five-mile outing was over, Maddy and I fell out of
the raft and floated around in our life jackets.
“Can we do it again?” She asked, and she’s
still asking.
|
|